2. Other

Bear Raided My Hummer

A bear raided my Hummer while it was parked right outside the house.
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He also didn't eat the Jack Links X stick. Those mini beef sticks are a little spicy, maybe he just isn't into hot and spicy food?
10 / 16

He also didn't eat the Jack Links X stick. Those mini beef sticks are a little spicy, maybe he just isn't into hot and spicy food?

  • I got up this morning and noticed that both of the driver's side doors on my Hummer H2 were wide open. Interesting, because I sure didn't leave them wide open.
  • Other than the doors being open, everything looks normal from here.
  • Hmmmm... I had an old bag of trail mix and a Clif bar on my passenger seat. There's nothing left but the bag and wrapper. Oh, and a packet of pepper. Where did that come from?
  • I opened the rear hatch and now I know where the pepper packet came from: the bear had gotten inside my GHB (Get Home Bag) and went after the MREs and other food I keep in there for emergencies.
  • His really liked the sweet items and snack items. That brown wrapper from one of the MREs used to have French Toast in it. The peanuts, crackers, cookies and brownies from the MREs were all eaten as were all of my Clif Bars.
  • Another shot. Notice how thoroughly he cleaned out the food bags. Meanwhile the hank of paracord is still in its original plastic wrapping, untouched.
  • At first I thought he was a Mexican bear. He polished off the Refried Black Beans but didn't seem interested in the Beef Ravioli in Meat Sauce.
  • The Beef Enchilada in Sauce was sampled, but I guess he didn't like it enough to polish it off. Maybe this wasn't a Mexican bear after all?
  • Nope, it couldn't possibly be a Mexican bear: the Tapatio hot sauce was still unopened.
  • He also didn't eat the Jack Links X stick. Those mini beef sticks are a little spicy, maybe he just isn't into hot and spicy food?
  • He tore into my bag of fire starter sticks and took a bite off one of them. I'm guessing he didn't like the taste and went back to the brownies and peanuts. I found the end of the stick that he bit off while cleaning up, he clearly spit that sucker right back out.
  • Other than making a small tear in the plastic bag for my polar-weight long underwear, he left them unharmed. He didn't tear my socks and didn't get into the red first aid kit in the background. My spare hat, 3-gal water jug, bungees, tape, etc. were all left alone.
  • The black day pack from Police One that serves as my GHB only had a few tears in it up in one corner. I got this thing on sale for something like 25 bucks. New marketing campaign for Police One?: 'Our stuff beats criminals AND bears'.
  • When he tugged on the bag, the zippers opened and all the goodies dropped out, so he didn't need to destroy it any further.
  • He didn't take a crap in the vehicle (often happens when bears break in) so he had no use for my roll of Charmin inside a ziploc bag up on the floor in front of the passenger seat. I guess he wasn't thirsty either because he left he bottle of Gatorade alone too.
  • To add insult to injury, he took one of the cookie wrappers and poked it into a gap up on the dashboard. I'm envisioning him comfortably sitting in the driver's set finishing his meal, trying to get the radio to play some tunes or maybe trying to figure out how to start the thing up so he could drive away. When he was finally ready to hop out, he shoves his cookie wrapper up there as a "calling card" and LAUGHS.
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